11 posts tagged “random”
So, right as I was typing up my last post, El and I noticed the most horrifying commercial EVER. (Okay, well maybe it was the second worst because that dancing toenail fungus commercial is pretty vile). Anyway, there was a commercial that opened with a series of the following four images: a porcupine, blowfish, skunk, and a lobster. What is the product that was being promoted? Vagisil! I'm sorry... if your ladyparts (or should I say, your "down there") can be compared in any capacity to any of the aforementioned creatures, an over-the-counter topical cream is just not going to do the trick. This commercial is horrible!
Uggh! Take a look for yourself...
Over the last few weeks, I've been having pretty vivid dreams that I've actually remembered after I have woken up (which is very weird for me). Many of the them haven't been unrealistic in nature, but last night's was definitely out there...
Last night's dream starts with Ellen and I arriving at BWI airport to meet up with Tara. The three of us were going on a trip somewhere (I'm not sure where) and we were flying on AirTran. We get there and BWI has turned into this huge AirTran headquarters or something. We only saw AirTran planes, AirTran employees, AirTran logos, etc. So after we see Tara, the three of us go through security. We make it through security and when we're gathering our stuff at the end of the x-ray machine, we're handed these three round coaster-sized tickets. The security woman told us that we must be special and that they didn't give those out often. The tickets had a list of karaoke song choices we were asked to look at as we were escorted to the VIP karaoke room. We go into the karaoke room and it is set up like a recording studio. The three of us start singing (I'm not sure what) and within a minute's time, I'm asked to leave because I'm "not as special" as they thought I was. El and Tara keep singing through this, unbothered that I am being asked to leave. So after I leave the karaoke room, I find an arcade is nearby. Inside the arcade I see Tim and Ted playing a boston terrier game. This was probably the weirdest part. They were throwing live boston terrier heads into holes, kind of like skeeball but without the length. The bostons didn't seem to be in pain; they were just being normal dogs (well, normal dogs without bodies I suppose). So Tim and Ted weren't earning tickets or anything like that. They were earning Weight Watchers points for each boston head they threw through the holes. In between throwing, they would take photos of themselves using their cell phone cameras.
I don't really remember anything after that, but I have been puzzled about it all day. Who knows what tonight will bring!
On the way home from Dover on Sunday afternoon, I noticed the following amusing phrase on the bumper of a rickety old pickup:
Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.
hehe... you have to love Southern Delaware!
El and I went to Denny's on Friday night to enjoy their culinary delights. I don't go to Denny's much, but when I do, I order one of their fancy, sugary-sweet beverages, and this trip was no exception. I ordered the Cherry Bling (Spite and cherry flavor) and took a big gulp of it. Right as this touched my tongue, I sensed that this drink was unlike any Cherry Bling I had before... it tasted just like that green foamy stuff that fake plants (and maybe real ones?) get shoved into at the bottom of the vase. It was so weird. I started laughing and told El that she had to try it... and she totally agreed with me.
Just wanted to share.
The following was announced throughout the agency today:
"If anyone left a pair of eyeglasses in the refrigerator or if you left a salad with a hairbrush on top in the refrigerator, please claim your items now. Thank you."
For whatever reason, I just can't get one line of the Old School version of the aforementioned song out of my head...
I fuckin' need you more than ever...
Hehe. Makes me giggle every time!
... from The Week this week (11/17/06) is as follows:
- An Australian firm launched the Wondercup, a line of underwear that claims to do for male genitalia what the Wonderbra does for women's breasts. "It basically lifts, separates, and extends," said creator Sean Ashby.
- A Florida man was ambushed and shot in the chest by two assailants as he took out the trash. The bullet was sopped by the two small Bibles has was carrying in his pocket.
- A survey of office workers found that the use of management jargon by bosses lowers employee morale. Workers said they were particularly depressed by the terms "getting one's ducks in a row" and "thinking outside the box."
- A retired New Jersey police officer is suing a man whose life he saved on the grounds that their encounter left him depressed. Two years ago, Sgt. Ron Nametko, 38, calmly persuaded a suicidal fellow office, Patrick O'Conner, 40, not to kill himself during a 45-minute standoff. Nametko now claims that the incident has left him with depression and frequent nightmares, for which he wants financial compensation. "You would think a fellow officer would be sympathetic for what Pat has gone through," said Alan Zagas, a lawyer for O'Conner.
- A Minnesota high school is selling advertising time during a student production of It's a Wonderful Life. Mounds View High School's theatrical rendering of the 1946 James Stewart classic, about a man discovering the true meaning of Christmas, will pause periodically for students to read ads from local businesses. The cost of a spot is $75, and businesses can also rent signage space on the stage set's backdrop.
- Per CNN/Opinion Research Corp: 41% of parents say they would want their child to grow up to be president. 58% say they would not.
- "Only those who are capable of silliness can be called truly intelligent." - Christopher Isherwood
- "Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business." - Dave Barry
- "Reality is a crutch for people who can't deal with drugs." - Robin Williams
- "Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of others." - Jules Renard
- Elephants are highly intelligent animals that, like apes and dolphins, can recognize their own reflection in a mirror, as researchers at the Bronx Zoo have found.
- You should be washing your hands vigorously for 30-45 seconds, which is roughly equivalent to singing "Row, row, row your boat" twice.
- 35% of employers that research prospective employees on the web have rejected a candidate due to contact found as a result. Red flags include omitted jobs on resumes to photos of drunken candidates at bars.
- Per CNNmoney.com: Depository institutions ordered $122 million in $2 notes last year, more than double the number orders between 1991 and 2000. Among the groups that have embraced the note is the exotic dancing industry: Strip clubs hand out $2 bills as change, and they end in dancers' garters. "It doubles their tip money," said Angelina Spencer of the Association of Club Executives.
I cannot stand Star Jones. I really have issue with her. Profound? Nope. But that's all I wanted to say.
So I just woke up for the second time this morning. Around four this morning, Grady bugged me until I woke up to let him out and give him a treat. I didn't want to give him a bowl of food yet because I wanted to go back to sleep and I didn't want him to poo in the house (see entry on Grady bringing a rabbit into the house when I left the back door open while I got ready for work). So I went back to sleep and woke up again just now, right before nine, and wow do I have an interesting dream on my mind.
Let me start with a back story. Ryan was my across the street neighbor who was five years older than me. I had the biggest crush on him for as long as I can remember. I vividly remember being nine years old and asking him if he could come over to my house to fill up my bicycle tires with air. As soon as he did that, I initiated "phase two" - I asked him to stay and play Nintendo with me (I had way more game at nine than I do at 25!). He usually would. I thought he was so cute and wrote in my diary about how one day he'd be my husband. Needless to say, many years have passed and I never received that engagement ring. I still hear about how he's doing and occasionally see him because his parents still live across the street from me. He's married to his high school sweetheart, has two children (a boy and a girl), and he and his wife are expecting another child soon.
Okay, now that you know all this, here's the dream...
The dream starts out with me needing to take a shower. I'm at a large house somewhere (not familiar at all to me from the outside or the inside). I go into a bathroom to take a shower and Ryan is in the bathtub and the tub is filled up with water. He moves over and tells me to get in. I don't think this is weird at all (apparently) and I get in the tub with him. He curls up around me and he's doesn't say much. In fact, during the whole dream he pretty much only speaks to me after I say something to him first. So I say something to him about not knowing how I'm going to wash my hair since he's laying down in the tub. I suggest that I can just come back later. He tells me to stay and he'll shampoo my hair since he knows how much I like that. I stayed and let him shampoo my hair, but I asked him how he knew that I liked that. He said that it was in one of my love letters. Now as a kid, I don't remember writing him love letters. If I did, they were in my Garfield diary and they were never, ever given to him. And I really don't think I would have written about wanting a guy to shampoo my hair when I was nine years old. Anyway, I accepted his answer and moved on with more questions. I asked him where we were and he said that we were at his house and he had been waiting for me for years. I asked what he meant by that and he said that in one of my letters to him it said that I would come for him on some date, which had passed many years back. He said he thought that when he was at his parents' house some time, I was supposed to ask him to put air in my car's tires and that would be the code. But now he was too wrapped up in his family to leave. I missed my chance with him, but he still wanted to shampoo my hair. After the bath, we went and sat under a tree in his yard. We were wrapped up in a blanket and were still naked from the bath. His wife looked outside and found us and immediately started to huff and puff. I asked if he needed to go and he said yes, so I let him go back in and straighten things up with her. Nothing overtly sexual happened during the dream, but it still seemed pretty sexual in nature. The weird thing was that the dream ended with me sitting naked wrapped in that same blanket in a recliner in his living room. I don't know why I didn't leave or why no one kicked me out, but there I was, just hanging out with his family, I guess now thinking that he should be mine because we had arranged through love letters for our little love story to go like that. I just don't get it.
So what the hell does this dream mean? Is it me just acting out on my little crush I had over 15 years ago? I'm so confused by this one.
